This is one I started a while ago, but thought it was a good chance to finish post it
Love would always be around the corner, your hair would always be perfect, and you would always have that perfect line or stare. You could dodge a bullet, or drive a car off a cliff and still get out without a bruise. you could get attacked and avenge your culprit, and the world would love you.
But unfortunately life is not like a movie or a comic book, we fall and get hurt, we love and get heartbroken, someone you love gets hurt, and there is no one to help them.
This is where real hero’s are missing, not the ones who fly around in cape’s, or shoot fire from there eyes, but the ones who see someone in distress and actually stand up to the situation and say, this in’t right, those are the real hero’s.
They don’t just look at the world and think yeah I can put up with that, They turn around and say, NO THIS IS NOT RIGHT, why can’t there be more people like that.
I think there are to many people worrying about what other people think about them. And wanting that hero to save them.
I think they’re more worried about the people that are going to save them than the people already doing the saving.
I always wanted to be that hero, and on many occasions I have tried, but unfortunately I haven’t got any appreciation, but I guess that is the work of a hero, never looking at ones own life, but taking the world off everyone else’s shoulders and putting it on mine.
That’s how my mind feels right now, I have all sorts of things going through my mind none stop 24/7, I mean my mind never turns off, constantly going from scenario to scenario. all of my problems, my friends problems, and the whole world’s problems, none stop, which I think is my cause of depression and insomnia.
So I have finnaly booked a appointment with my quack, and hopefully they can sort me out, and I can become the super hero I was meant to be. Still with the awesome powers, and the ability to save the world, but without the Professor X style of hearing everyone at the same time.
This is more of a personal thing. The sort of thing that I usually I wouldn’t share on my usual social network sites, but it needs to be said.
Personally I suffer from depression. I have never been diagnosed, simply because I have never had the courage to go to the doctors and say. But I have always suffered from it. Sometime’s, well allot of time, I can’t sleep, because I’m awake most the night in tears, simply because I don’t know what to do. Not because I’m poor, or had a bad upbringing, in fact I have a very good upbringing, but simply because I do not know what to do with my life. But I never admitted it because I was, and am, afraid what people will think. Well that’s a lie, I know what I want to do, I want to move to America, work for a brewery, and be in charge of distribution, this is what I know, this is what I want, but these are just dreams.
I have a very, none unique method of dealing with depression, and that is plenty of drink and allot of Vulcan emotion suppression.
But this all eventually builds up, and you need some sort of out let, which for me is my Blog. This Blog is an absolute outlet for all my emotions which is why, some post will be happy, others will be sad, and other will be just down right strange.
Either way, everybody needs some sort of outlet for their day to day routine. Thankfully Blogging does the job for now, for me. But eventually, I, we, will all need help of some sort and you should never be afraid of asking for it.
Luckily, I have recently found somebody I can talk to, as myself, and that is a fantastic feeling, and I hope this carries on and I can be happy with being myself.
But for now, life goes on, happy or sad, it’s my life and I need to deal with it, although it’s not the life I want.
That’s it for now.
Art by jxdx